Preheat the oven to 350°F. Grease and flour three 8-inch cake pans.

Beat the butter with an electric mixer until fluffy. Beat in the sugar and date paste for 5 minutes. Beat in the eggs, one at a time.

In a separate bowl, combine the flour, baking powder and salt. Beat in the flour mixture and coconut milk, alternating, beginning and ending with the flour mixture. Beat in the vanilla until just mixed.

Evenly pour the batter into the prepared cake pans and evenly spread it out. Bake for 25-30 minutes or until a cake tester comes out clean. Allow the cakes to cool in the pans for 5 minutes before turning out onto cooling racks to cool completely.

While your oven is still on, evenly spread 2 cups of the shredded coconut onto a baking sheet. Bake until lightly toasted. Scoop out 1 cup of the toasted coconut and place in a bowl to cool. Continue to bake the remaining cup of coconut until it becomes a darker toasted color. Pour that remaining darker toasted coconut in a separate bowl to cool. Pour your last cup of coconut that has not been toasted in another bowl. Set aside for decoration and turn off your oven.

Beat the cream cheese and butter together until combined and fluffy (about 1 minute). Beat in the powdered sugar, 1 cup at a time until combined. Beat in the coconut extract and (only add milk if your frosting is too thick) milk.

Reserve 1 cup of the frosting and beat with the heavy whipping cream. Divide the filling in half and spread half on the first cake layer. Place the second layer on top and spread out the remaining filling. Top with the last cake layer.

Frost the outside of your cake with the frosting and gently layer the toasted coconut cake on the entire cake, creating an ombre effect. I began with the darker coconut on the bottom and worked my way up to the un-toasted coconut on the top. Refrigerate the cake until ready to serve.